


Despondent (An Othertale Story)

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, You've been warned, also there's a lot of death, another undertale au, anyway chara narrates some stuff, as if we don't already have enough of those, by some stuff i mean the entire story, oh boy would you look at that
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-05
Updated: 2017-01-05
Packaged: 2018-09-14 21:49:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9204746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: The year is 201X.  Chara, the first fallen human in the Underground, has been living with the Dreemurr family for months, and is planning a way to allow for all monsters to make it back to the surface.  But everything changes when their brother, Asriel, is killed before the plan has a chance to follow through.





	1. Dereliction

I lie awake, staring at the ceiling, and sigh.  I feel nerves bubbling within my stomach and turn onto my side, glancing at the clock on my nightstand.  Two in the morning.  I flop my head back down onto my pillow and shift my gaze to the bed across the room from mine.  I see the small figure of my brother breathing in and out deeply.

“Asriel?” I whisper.  I wait for a reply, but all I hear is the sound of his breathing.  With another sigh, I turn back onto my back and close my eyes, though they aren’t heavy.

“Chara?” comes Asriel’s voice just as I’m about to roll over yet again.  “Did you call me?”

“Yeah,” I mutter, turning to face him once more, “I can’t sleep.”  Asriel snorts and sits up in his bed, his eyes struggling to make me out in the dark.

“No kidding,” he yawns.  “What’s up?”

“I…” I begin, then trail off.  What can I say?  I’m anxious?  Worried?  Sad?

“It’s the plan, isn’t it?” he asks.  I can feel the weight of his words from the other side of the room.

“No,” I lie quickly.  Too quickly.  I bite my lip and sigh.  I can’t keep secrets from my brother.  He knows me too well for that.

“Well…” I begin again.  “I just… I don’t know.  It’s… I’m…”

“It’s okay to be scared,” he replies with sincerity.  “I don’t want you to die either, I just…”

I sit upright in bed and stare him right in the eye, offended.  “I am _not_ afraid of dying,” I hiss, frowning at him.  He stares back at me, puzzled.

“Then what _are_ you afraid of?” he asks.

“I’m afraid of failing!” I nearly yell, then lower my voice once again.  “I just… I don’t want to screw this up.  I can’t screw it up.”  There’s a moment of silence between us before Asriel slumps back into his bed, pulling the covers up past his chin.

“I know you, Chara,” he whispers.  “You’re determined.  And when you’re determined to do something…”  His voice trails off midsentence, leaving me wondering what he was going to say, but the light sound of snoring that soon follows this silence keeps me from speaking up.

I lie back down, too, and allow myself to close my eyes and settle into a restless sleep.

It’s when I wake up hours later that the true hell begins.

 

My eyes open lazily and I roll onto my side, yawning.  My body is heavily from my not-so-deep sleep, and it takes me a few moments to gather the energy to sit up.  When I finally do, I immediately notice that something is wrong.  The room is too still, too quiet.  My eyes wander to the empty bed across from me.

Pulling the blankets around my shoulders, I slowly climb out of my bed, drawn to the note on Asriel’s pillow.  I glance at the clock—around six in the morning—and furrow my brow as I reach out and grab the note.  It takes my eyes a moment to adjust in the dim light before I can read his rushed handwriting.

_Went out to get supplies.  See you soon._

_-A_

I place the note back down, confusion written across my face.  “Supplies…” I mutter to myself in my post-slumber daze.

Then it hits me.

I feel my eyes widen with fear and realization as I sprint out of our bedroom and turn down the hallway, toward our parents’ garden.  Asriel can’t be getting supplies for the plan.  They’ll kill me—and they’ll certainly kill him.

As my bare feet slap against the cold, hard corridor, I feel the blanket slip off my shoulders, causing a cold shiver to run through my body.  When I reach the garden, I lean against the wall, my eyes scanning the room.

And in less than a minute, my life changes.

Asriel’s small body huddles near the center of the room, bright yellow buttercups surrounding him.  He’s shaking, but he doesn’t seem to be too ill.  Not until I walk closer, at least.

“Asriel?” I whisper, the words nearly refusing to escape my lips.  He slowly lifts his head, saliva pooling at the edges of his mouth and gloss coating over his eyes.

“Chara…” he murmurs, reaching out to me, but his hand falls quickly to the flowers, causing their pollen to leap back into his face.  He coughs, then raises his head, tears in his eyes.

“What the hell were you thinking?” I finally ask, feeling an angry tone creep into my voice as I stare at the him, his ears drooping into his eyes.  He props himself up onto his knees to look me directly in the eyes, but his gaze is so unfocused he has trouble.

“I thought I could get the supplies—” his hoarse voice croaks, but another cough sends him back down to his hands and knees.  I run a hand through my hair, my bangs flopping back onto my now-sweaty forehead.

“You… you idiot!” I finally shout after a moment of silence.  “Those things are poisonous!  If they’ll kill me by eating them, they… they’ll kill you…” I mutter, my voice trailing off.  “Why did you eat them?”

“Wait,” Asriel replies, clearly struggling to speak now.  “Chara.  You can absorb my soul.  You can finish the plan.  I trust you—”

“No I can’t!” I screech, realizing, for the first time, that my brother is dying.  I drop to my knees next to him and grasp his chin, pulling it up so I can see his face.  He’s fighting a losing battle, and I know that if I face the facts, he won’t last long.

“You have to try,” he whispers.  Tears begin to spill over his eyes, and he wipes at them as best he can with what little strength he has left.

“I…” I whisper back before my blood runs cold.  We stare in silence as hit white, glowing soul slowly tears itself away from his chest, floating high above us.  I stare back at him, and in this moment, I see true, pure terror.

“No…” I whisper.  His mouth hangs open in a state of shock, and his eyes meet mine one last time before his focus is turned instead to something else:

The dust that his body is beginning to become.

“No,” he croaks, his hand reaching out and grabbing my arm.  “I don’t want to die—”

It happens in a flash.  His voice is silenced.  Gripping my arm is no longer a pleading hand, but dust.  The white soul floating above us is no longer glowing, it’s shaking.

And then it shatters.

Then there is silence.  Beautiful silence.  I sit there for a moment, not drawing my arm back, not crying, not feeling.  Just sitting.  I could stay sitting in the garden, my brother’s tomb, for hours, and I very well plan to—but then I hear footsteps.

“Asriel?” bellows a very familiar, deep voice from down the hall.  “Chara?”  Our father.

I feel like gasping, or crying, or yelling, but I do none of those things.  Instead, I snap my head to Asriel’s dust, and a feeling of raw, rabid instinct kicks in.  Something stirs deep within me, and I have the desire not to stay and mourn the loss of my brother, but rather to flee.

I push myself up off of the flowers and turn without looking back.  The primal feeling in me keeps me running.  I run straight out of the garden, to the Judgment Hall, to outside of the castle walls, all without stopping to consider what I am doing or why I’m doing it.

All I know is I can’t show my face to my parents ever again.  I killed their son.  I can’t go back.

I can’t go back.

I can’t go back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo! Okay, a few things to go over:
> 
> 1) This is an AU that I created completely by myself. So, ya know, that means this would be the canon story for Othertale.  
> 2) The main idea in this AU is that Asriel died before Chara had the chance to, leaving them alone in the Underground.  
> 3) After each chapter, I'll probably link a song that I would picture goes along with the chapter. In this case, that song would be "This is Gospel" by Panic! at the Disco (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crwE3Tw_k0Q)
> 
> Thank you all for reading! Please feel free to comment or send me a message (I love talking, if you couldn't tell).


	2. Incongruity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize I never depicted Chara's age-- in this story, I imagine them to have fallen when they were 12-13, meaning they are now around 13-14.

My legs burn from running.  Despite the ache in my lungs and the hot air swirling past me like a slap in the face, however, I continue on.  I haven’t stopped moving.  I can’t stop moving.  The moment I stop moving, my brain will be able to catch up to my body, and I can’t afford to think.  Not right now.

The steam surrounding me causes me to gasp as I run, forcing me to slow to a walk.  I have a moment to examine my surroundings: the deep red soil, the dry, cracked walls, the flaming inhabitants.  In another moment, I realize I’ve entered Hotland.  Still gasping for air that refuses to fill my lungs, I giggle to myself.  How long have I been running?  Ten minutes?  Thirty?  Long enough to run through the Core and away from the castle, that’s for sure.

I begin to get so lost in my calculations that I nearly run headfirst into a large, protruding metal door.  A large, dusty window and rusty doorknob greet me, and I slowly raise my fist to knock.

Two raps.  That’s all it takes before I hear the rustling of papers and quick footsteps nearing me from the other side of the building.  As I wait for the voice to speak to me, I look up and examine the building.  It’s very severe, and I feel unwelcomed.  I clear my throat and turn my attention back to the door.

“H-hello?” comes a nasally voice.  “Who’s there?”

“I’m, uh…” I mutter, unsure if I should tell this person who I really am.  “May I come in?”

“I…” the voice trails off, clearly unsure how to respond.  I furrow my brow and take a silent breath before speaking again.

“Chara.  Dreemurr.  I’ve come to—”

I’m cut off by the door swinging open, nearly hitting me in the forehead.  I glance down at the small, nervous figure standing in the doorway.  She has small horns atop her head and wears a pair of fogged-up, bent glasses.  She seems distraught.

“Oh!  O-oh my, I…” she begins, wringing her hands together, before she steps aside and allows me to enter.  I quickly step inside what I can only imagine is a lab, walking past a bathroom, a cluttered desk, and a large television screen before I reach the other door.

“Wait!” she calls out, and I turn, one hand already on the doorknob, to look at her.  I raise my eyebrows, feeling my annoyance creep onto my face, and wait for her to reply.

“Um… a-are you—I mean, would you like t-to, uh, stay?” she asks, wringing her hands once again.  I try to feel pity for her—this girl seems to be living alone in a cold lab, and she can’t be much older than me—but I simply shake my head.

“Thanks for letting me through,” I reply, turning the doorknob and pushing open the heavy door.

“Oh… I, um—” she begins, but she’s cut off by a flashing red light.  I nearly jump, surprised by the sirens that go off along with it, and my curiosity gets the better of me.  I step back inside, one hand still on the doorknob, and open my mouth to speak before the television screen suddenly turns on.

My heart catches in my throat.

Asriel’s name and picture show up on the screen, followed by the words:

 ** _Prince Asriel Dreemurr, son of King Asgore and Queen Toriel, has been officially claimed deceased as of 6:43 this morning.  The young heir’s dust was found in the Royal Garden, atop some of the Queen’s favorite flowers.  There have been no reports on the status of the rest of the family_**.

It takes a moment to move after hearing the community PSA.  But when I can, I run, and I don’t stop running until I’m sure I’m far enough from my troubles again.  I pause, kneeling down to catch my breath, and when I rise and look around, I’m taken aback by the cloaked figure standing in front of me.  I can’t see their face, but after quick inspection, I realize they’re standing atop a low boat in a very narrow river.  I run a hand through my bangs and step forward, causing them to raise their head in my direction.

“Ah, hello, there,” comes a deep voice.  I stare back at the cloaked figure, twisting my hands together behind my back.  It takes a moment for them to continue speaking to me.  “Would you like a ride?”

I pause, contemplating my decisions up to this point.  I ran away from home.  I ran away from my troubles.  I ran away from him.  A little more running couldn’t hurt.

“Sure,” I reply, tentatively stepping closer to the water’s edge.

“Where would you like to go?” they ask, and I pause once more.  After falling Underground months ago, I was immediately rescued by the Queen and taken to the castle.  Sure, I’d been out a few times, but everything I really needed was inside the castle.  I’m not sure what truly lies outside those walls.

“Where can I go?” I ask after another moment of silence.  The figure chuckles slowly.

“Waterfall or Snowdin,” they reply lazily.  I shrug my shoulders and decide to step into the boat.  It wobbles, but after a moment, I steady myself and sit down.

“Snowdin,” I reply, genuinely unsure of exactly what I am choosing.  The figure leans down, and for a moment I think they’re about to sit with me, but they simply pick up a paddle lying on the  bottom of the boat and begin to paddle.

“Then we’re off,” they reply, and as we row along, they hum a simple tune under their breath.  It calms me, allowing me to lean back and close my eyes.  I’d so desperately like to drift off and wake up in my own bed, Asriel across from me.

Asriel.

I’ve stopped moving.  I’ve allow my mind to wander.  Opening my eyes, I think back to the first day I arrived at the castle—lonely, afraid… and then I met him.  He smiled at me.  That was all.  Just a smile.  I smiled back, hesitantly, and for some odd reason, he chuckled.  At the time, I thought he was laughing at me.  But now, I realize he was laughing at the situation—how odd it must have been to be standing in front of a human when all you’ve known is life Underground.

That same day, he showed me the garden.  I wince as I remember it, but the memory doesn’t sting enough to cause tears to form in my eyes.  Instead, the sting is just subtle enough to make me feel the same rush I did when I woke up alive.

I climbed up the mountain after hearing the rumors for years.  I knew no one made it out.  I knew it wasn’t safe.  But I couldn’t take life on the surface anymore.  I couldn’t take life at all anymore.  So I vowed that I wouldn’t.  I would simply stop existing.  That’s the way my mind works—I don’t worry about how things might be.  I just allow them to happen.

I sit up sharply in the boat.  My self-realization makes me gasp, but I quickly contain myself.  Maybe if I hadn’t allowed things to happen on their own, Asriel would still be alive.  I bite my lip as I wonder thi s to myself, but deep down I know that wondering won’t solve anything.  He’s gone.  I don’t have any power over that.

The boat slows, and a sudden gust of chilly air brings me to my senses.  I quickly rise and clamber out of the boat, falling onto the snow bank we’ve arrived at.

“Come again sometime,” the mysterious figure bellows, then begins to hum once more.  I nod once, still uncertain of what lies ahead, and slowly turn to face the small, frozen town that lies ahead of me.

Within two minutes, I’m overwhelmed.  The inn, the shop, the houses, _everything_.  It’s just too much.  I feel my breathing grow heavy, and I stumble over to a nearby tree, sliding down until I’m sitting against it.  Damp, icy snow wets my shorts, but I’m too lightheaded to care.  I hold my head in m hands, trying to steady whatever is swimming about in it, but I can’t.

Asriel.

Mom.

Dad.

It’s too much.  The town is too bright, too busy, and my mind is too dark.  My chest heaves and I feel like screaming, but I can’t.  I can only sit and wait for my breathing to slow.  After minutes of sitting in the agonizing cold, I can finally feel my heartbeat begin to slow.

That’s when I’m suddenly aware of the pair of black shoes standing in front of me.

Slowly, I raise my head to see a man wearing a long black coat and heavy snow boots.  His mouth is contorted, twisted into an oddly sad grin, and two distinct lines run down his face, on either side of his eyes.  He stands calmly above me, holding out a hand.  I can only stare back at him in fear.  That’s when he speaks.

“Hello.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright! Another one done!
> 
> 1) All characters are 10 years younger than the original Undertale game. That means, for me, Alphys would be around 16 or 17.  
> 2) In this story, I'd picture Chara to be somewhere between sociopathic and apathetic. However, this doesn't mean that they don't feel conflict or pain-- in fact, this may be why they DO feel these things.  
> 3) The song I've chosen for this chapter is "The Kids Aren't Alright" by Fall Out Boy (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PuGUUZqNfjE). I think it really depicts Chara's internal struggle as they force themselves not to feel the pain of loss, despite being very aware of it.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you once again!


End file.
